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How long is forever? We all want to love forever when we fall in love. How long is forever and how long can we keep our love? My parents just celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary. Love in my parents’ generation was not romantic in my eyes. I had read my parents’ letters and diaries, and there was no commitment, no swearing of true love, and no romantic words. Mostly they talked about their work, their studies and their political progress. My father’s first gift that he gave to my mother was a notebook written in his own hand of a collection of Chairman Mao’s poems. I really doubted whether there was deep love between them when they married. Life was not easy at that year in China. My parents were separated after they married. Even though they had one vacation per year to see each other, sometimes they were too busy and could not see each other that year. My father just came home and looked at me after I born and then he left. When he came back again, I was about two years old. He went to my babysitter’s home to pick me up. I was playing with other , and he asked my babysitter who was my mother's . The babysitter let him guess who I was. When I was 8 years old, my father receive approval to transfer to my mother’s place. They finally lived together after they had been married for ten years. Ten years of separation in a marriage for our generation is impossible. In their later 20 years of marriage, my parents were busy working and bringing up their . I seldom felt they deeply loved each other. In these last 10 years, after they retired, I found there was indeed a deep love inside my parents’ life. They caringly take care of each other well and are perfect partners for each other. I admire my parents’ journey they took together from their youth to old age. I think their love is both romantic and beautiful. Love is inside life, and love makes life strong and warm. A successful love is love shared with one person for a lifetime, and this is love forever. 
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7/9/2005 7:35 am |
Back there, the people are much more indirect in expressing their loves. Well, my parents only met for 2 months and they got married!!! Ive asked my parents how can that be happening. They replied by saying tat the people in olden days are very honest compared to the modern world. huh.. unbelievable.
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7/9/2005 8:24 am |
The fated make joked for my parents let them get wrong married.But since my father pass away in 1988 then my mother happy again.......... So,when I was teenager I was heard argument,fighting from my parents.I talked to my mother,"why not divorce with father, why you keeping that married so painful" but my mother she is typical traditionalism........ So parents's married not only for them if they have kids....I can't feel love from my parents....it was sad.......
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7/9/2005 8:49 am |
Why I just told teenager I know my parents argument,because my grandmother take care of me when I was baby,We live in New territory which is a very small old village in Kowloon and my parents was living in Kowloon City.At that time I only can see my parents two time a years. When I was 13 years old we was living together untill I get married..................
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Nice love story.
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7/9/2005 12:06 pm |
that's sounds very difficult... what was holding up the transfer for him to be with his family... can people not move from region to region freely..???
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7/10/2005 10:43 pm |
Waterplant, Every happy family is almost same, every unhappy family is different. I’m so sorry to hear your story. There are many unhappy marriages in the world. Not every couple stays with love. One of my friends also has unhappy marriage. Her husband is a very selfish man with bad emotion. When he was angry, he hit her and daughter to release even it was not their fault. Her daughter asked her why she married with such a bad man. She said, if she could be independent she would divorce with her husband. Anyway, we can learn from both happy and unhappy marriage.
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To some extent, Westerners are very lucky as they are free to live together with their lovers. However, I have been wondering why so many couples got divorced even they did had loved each other truely and deeply.
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7/14/2005 5:41 am |
my parents have the same hardship when they were in china. in the 1960s when they married they were sent to the countryside. my father went to a reform camp and my mother to a remote countryside to work as farmer. i think the old china is more hardship so that is why maybe long term relation works. erica visit my blog and let's chat
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