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n8tive_american
(Lu )
54M
496 posts
6/30/2007 8:38 am

Last Read:
3/11/2009 10:25 am

A Journey In Reflection.

For those who know me best, you know that I am always on the move, always seeking out life's little mysteries and the things that make life worth living. But recently I was reminded that one of those things is family.
My paternal grandmother slipped away a few days ago. She was a true friend, probably the only one in the family that understood me best. It's where I get my weird side. HA!! I'm a six foot tall, 278 pound rough cut man who can live off the land in almost any conditions, and yet I like classical music and chamomile tea. I am the last person you might expect to knit or crochet with tiny hooks or needles, and if you saw the way I am built, you would NOT expect my favorite color to be YELLOW. But yet, my granny knew. Yellow was her favorite color too, and we often times traded crochet books.
And as I reflected the things I have had the blessing to do with my grandmother, I found out that others in the family were not so blessed. My cousin Sandy said at the funeral that he had not seen granny in over 21 years. I thought about it and realized that was when the family got together to say goodbye to Uncle Charlie. I suddenly felt so sad.
After the funeral, Uncle Buddy (Sandy's father)invited the family to his house for an informal reception. I did not know he lived so close by, only about 3 or 4 miles from where I live. That was another shock to my system. And then it occured to me, that Sandy comes to visit his father twice a year. And even Sandy did not know I lived so close to his father. As close as Sandy and I were when we were growing up, that's what probably hurt me the most. He taught me sign language so I could alwyas talk to him, because he is deaf. Yes, we were THAT close. He and I would sometime fuss between ourselves, but if anyone ever raised their voice to him....well, let us just say I handled the situation in an honorable family way.
Then Sandy got the shock of his young life when he found out that he lives only a six hour drive from Aunt Pat. (Sandy has to drive for almost 10 hours to get here from his home in Tennessee.) Aunt Pat learned sign language so she could help Sandy with his homework when he was very young, so the two of them have a very special bond as well.
I remember Aunt Pat cried so hard at Unlce Charlie's funeral that Sandy stood on on side of her and told me to follow his lead. I got on her other side and then we tickled Aunt Pat unle she promised not to cry any more. She also threatened to burn our eyes out with hot pokers while we slept or something nearly as violent. HA!! So at granny's funeral, Aunt Pat was especially weary of where she stood and exactly how my she cried. I wonder why.
I get on my wife all the time about how she needs to spend time with her family, call her grandmother from time to time, blah, blah, blah. I think it's time I started taking my own advice too. It hurts when someone you love passes, but I think the greater pain is in not having known someone well.
Until next time, remeber to call your family!!

Many Blessings.
Bear.


GoldmanHuangShan 68M

6/30/2007 10:30 am

Bear..... welcome back..... my handle's changed !

Goldman


TopGent2
(Roger F)
73M
1334 posts
7/2/2007 2:25 pm

You know I mean well, but I've always thought that the 'big bear' was a bit of a teddy - soft centre and all that.
I too can live off the land and stay well out of sight, and often wish to go back to those days.
Families are a strange mix and yet can often be your best friedns. I have no close family left now my father has gone - brother, sisters and even my mum don't come close to the relationship I had with my father - he taught me everything about the wildlife and the way creatures lived, hunted and survived and how that was how 'we' should be if we wish to live in their world.
I come to this place vey infrequently now, but am pleased I caught this blog before it got swamped by the ever growing numbers of selfish bloggers how post dozens at a time trying to take up a whole page.
Living in the wilds along side those that try and survive a wilderness is something very few can do and worst still even fewer would want to try.
Good to hear you're still around and doing those things that bring you pleasure.
TG


n8tive_american
(Lu )
54M
1289 posts
7/20/2007 4:47 pm

Goldman....Congradulations on your new handle. I see you have posted quiet a few things to read here. I see I`m going to very busy.


n8tive_american
(Lu )
54M
1289 posts
7/20/2007 5:08 pm

Top Gent....My god-daughter is something special but I have my hands full trying to teach her respect for nature. Men like us are a rare breed. I can tell you probably were taught to respect the land, not just merely how to live off the land. As an American Indian, that type of respect is drilled into us...after all, it is part of our heritage. My god-daughter though, she's a little different. She is a typical big city girl, her parents don't do any camping or hiking....therefore they have no real understanding of nature. Recently she came down for a visit and I spent the better part of 2 hours trying to keep her from hitting sapling trees with a stick.
And I am very glad that you were able to catch this posting. You'll also be pleased to know that I am planning a wekend hike in North Carolina just at the beginning of fall. Up in the mountains near the center of the state is a mineral mine. Two of my buds and I plan to go up for a weekend, do a little camping and a little panning for emeralds. I'll be sure to keep you in my thoughts and prayers on that journey.

Many Blessings.
Bear.