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What Makes A Malaysian A Malaysian?
Posted:Sep 23, 2009 2:14 am
Last Updated:Jul 15, 2012 7:13 pm
14062 Views
What Makes A Malaysian A Malaysian?

1. A typical young Malaysian can name all the players from a top English Premier League club, but ask him to name one football player from Malaysia, he cannot!

2. When StreamyX come, you complain StreamyX too slow. When Maxis Broadband come, you complain Maxis Broadband always disconnects. When WiMax come, you complain Wimax too expensive.
In the end, you say StreamyX still the best lah.

3. When highway toll price increase, you complain. When petrol price increase, you complain. When you go Starbucks buy RM10 coffee, NO COMPLAINTS.

4. When you cannot find parking in a shopping mall and have to walk very far, you complain. When you go inside the shopping mall and there's SALE , run from one end of 1Utama to the other, that one NO COMPLAINT.

5. You are always late. And the excuse you give when you're late is always either: (a) traffic jam (b) no transport or (c) cannot find parking.

6. You have a parent who forces you to take science stream in high school, study engineering in Uni, then when you graduate, they ask you to forget everything you learnt in Uni and do commerce.

7. You know someone who can specially develop an angmoh accent when speaking to an American / British / Australian.

8. You complain against the government in kopitiam, you talk loud loud. Leave anonymous comments on blogs, you also talk loud loud. Attend ceremah by DAP, you shout loud loud. Then when Opposition organise a protest and ask you to go, you dun wan. Scared later kena tangkap by ISA.

9. Every year on the 30th April, you are one of the people below queuing up last minute to submit your tax return at the IRB.

10. When you pay RM10 for something that costs RM1, you blame the Chinese.

11. When a government service is too slow, you blame the Malays.

12. When a building is not good and collapsed, you blame the Indians.

13. When a Chinese student won a scholarship, you say 'Wah! Very clever hor?' When a Malay student won a scholarship, you say 'Aiya! Of course lah! He Malay mah!' :\

14. When an angmoh stranger kisses you on the cheek to say hello, you very happy. When a Malaysian guy kisses you on the cheek to say hello, you slap him in face.

What a joke
0 Comments
GONG XI GONG XI
Posted:Feb 2, 2009 9:11 pm
Last Updated:Sep 14, 2009 7:48 pm
14566 Views












































ҿǻ˺ܶrgŰTՈ,ҵһҪҸ옷ร
0 Comments
女追男最好別試以下庸計
Posted:Jan 9, 2009 9:59 pm
Last Updated:Sep 23, 2009 1:28 am
13731 Views

男追女隔重山,女追男隔層紗,仿佛只要你有勇氣捅破這層紗,得到男人的心就如囊中取物。其實不然,愛情速食化的今天,還是有許多愛他在心口難開的女人,只因她們缺乏一套步驟清晰的戰略方針。

就如張小嫻所言,不要對苦練內在修行以追上對你的外形心存顧慮的男人抱太多希望。女人的追求其實只是用行動告訴這個男人,請你追求我!意思是拉開架勢,垂下魚線,願者上鉤而已。

女追男最好別試以下庸計

送花
最大限度挑戰他的男兒本色,要知道女追男已經是一重挑戰啦。

寫情書
白紙黑字或電腦存檔,一旦失敗羞辱將永遠保存,還洋洋灑灑N多字。

拉橫幅最流行之男追女招數,反過來用在女追男上,就算他對你有心也會被嚇跑。

直接對他說我愛你如果他是靦腆型,會因你火力太猛而不知如何是好,如果他是外向型,會因失去了第一次說“我愛你"的權力而不爽。

肉搏戰
天氣熱哄哄,肉搏戰也許容易讓他無法抗拒。然而如果他無法抗拒的只是你暴露過多的身體,佔過便宜就跑,你就死的太難看啦。

自我吹噓
從公司傑青到天才兒童,以為把自己描繪成希拉裡就能迫使他主動出擊,忘了人家需要的是老婆而不是CEO。

守株待兔
長髮美女每天守在公司樓下或家門口,橫聽豎看都像鬼故事。

卑微到塵埃
“你現在可能不愛我,但我願意等。”“我知道自己配不上你,然而我是世界上最愛你的人。”這樣的愛情,就算得到了,以後男人變心變意也會振振有辭:“我本來都不愛你,是你死纏爛打來著。”

免費全職鐘點工無微不至的照顧不用白不用,男人不會跟你客氣
0 Comments
放手
Posted:Oct 29, 2008 12:32 am
Last Updated:Jul 15, 2012 7:42 pm
15609 Views

“喂,Darling方便嗎?我們一起喝下午茶好嗎。”

“好,我們老地方見。”

當我知道他外面有女人,而且還生了一個2歲的孩子,我一連哭了3天。最後,我沒有鬧,也沒有上吊,我只是打了一通電話給他,邀他喝下午茶。我相信,發生這種事,一般女友/太太都是最後一個才知道。

不到半小時,就看見他從門外走進這家咖啡店。認真的看看他,已步入中年的身材雖有點發福,但這反而讓他看起更加成熟、更加穩重。這些日子以來,也蠻辛苦他的,心已在別的女人處,對我還是那樣的隨傳隨到,我自嘲的在想。

“Sorry,讓你久等了。”他還沒坐在椅子上,就向我道歉。

仔細的想一想,我們這幾年的生活,也都這樣的相敬如賓,沒有吵架。原來看似老夫老妻的平淡生活,老早已陷入了危機,最糟的是自己還一無所覺。整理一下心情,我才開口說話

“不,我也是才到,我已幫你叫了一杯你愛喝的咖啡,趁熱喝吧。”

“謝謝。”他喝了一口咖啡,接著對我說:“不是說頭痛請了病假,沒去上班,怎麼還跑出來?你看你,眼睛還腫腫的。”

“頭痛哪比得上心痛。”我低聲的說。

“啊,你說甚麼?”

“沒有,我只是說有件事想和你商量。”

“有事情?這麼重要嗎?你身體不服舒就呆在家,等我回去再談也不遲。”

我搖搖頭,苦笑的說:“我們分手吧!”

在沒有預警的情況下聽了這句話,他愣了一下,問道:“為甚麼?”

“是時候了,給那孩子一個名份。”

“你知道了?”

真是明人眼前不用說暗話。

“是,我知道了。”

“我們一定要分手嗎?她不在乎名份。”

“她不在乎,我在乎。”
我一時控制不了情緒,提高了聲量。我閉上眼睛告訴自己:今天,你不是要跟他吵架的,冷靜一下。我壓低自己的聲量,繼續說:“別說這麼多了,孩子需要一個家,一個完整的家。”

或許,他最瞭解我,知道我決定了的事是很難改變的;或許,他也想給他們一個家。

“對不起。”

“別這樣說,一直以來,你對我都很好。”

“我還愛你。”

“我也還愛你,只是我比較愛自己。”

“為甚麼,你總是可以那麼理智的處理事情,那麼瀟灑的生活。”

“不,我也掙扎過。或許,如果我們擁有孩子,我就瀟灑不起來,我會和她爭到底。”

“我在你心中,原來不是那樣重要。”

我勉強的擠出微笑。人就是這樣,明明已選擇他人了,還要人家把他放在第一位。但,他不會知道,他在我心中一直以來都占著很重要的位子,在發生此事之前,與他白頭偕老,是我最大的願望。

這時,他的手機響起。

他聽了電話,對我說:“我們現在住的房子,你就住著。公司有事,我得先走。”

“好,你先走吧。”

“往後,我們還可以像現在這樣喝喝咖啡、聊聊天,我們還可以做朋友嗎?”他吞吞吐吐的說。

“我相信你將會是個很好的朋友。”

“記得,有任何需要我幫忙的,一定要找我。”

“謝謝。”

望著熟悉的背影遠去,想哭的感覺再次的湧上心頭,眼眶濕濕的。但既然我已選擇放手,我就不會怨了。有緣在一起,就該好好的珍惜;無緣,又何必要糾纏著對方不放呢!

在少了他的空間,濃濃誘人的咖啡,依然散發出香味,肆意散落在空氣中,街道上的車子也依然熙熙攘攘。
0 Comments
「看走眼」
Posted:Oct 19, 2008 8:41 pm
Last Updated:Sep 3, 2010 5:28 am
14578 Views
以前提到結婚,想到「天長地久」;現在提到結婚,想到「能撐多久」。

當初會結婚,說是「看上眼];後來會離婚,說是「看走眼」。

婚前,愛情是「神話」;婚後,愛情是「笑話」。

男人花錢,是為了讓女人「高興」;女人花錢,是因為男人讓她「不高興」。

嫁入「豪門」,要懂得理財;嫁入「寒門」,要懂得生財。

以前的人,視婚姻生活為「一輩子」;現代的人,視婚姻生活為「一陣子」。

婚前,男人在「餐廳」等女人;婚後,女人在「客廳」等男人。

婚前,男人經常找女人「討論」;婚後,男人只告訴女人「結論」。

婚前,男人對她「悄悄」講話;婚後,男人對她「大聲」講話。

戀愛時,「情話 綿綿」;結婚後,「謊話連連」。

戀愛時的男人,喜歡「毛手毛腳」;結婚後的男人,變成「沒手沒腳」。

婚前,情侶做什麼都是「浪漫」;婚後,夫妻做什麼都是「浪費」。

想結婚,是「自己」已能獨立;想離婚,是「子女」已獨立。

婚前的男人,大都很「幽默」;婚後的男人,大都很「沉默」。

女人的記性,吵架時「最好」;男人的耐性,結婚後「最差」。

戀愛時,一見面就「親嘴」;結婚後,一見面就「鬥嘴」。

婚前,男人常給女人「空白支票」;婚後,男人常給女人「空頭支票」。

戀愛時,生活「妙不可言」;結婚後,日子「苦不堪言」。

婚前,男人天天盯著女人;婚後,女人天天盯著男人。

熱戀時,總相許下輩子「再結良緣」;結婚後,懷疑上輩子「造作孽緣」。

大男人,會「作威作福」;好男人,會「作牛作馬」。

婚前,「謊話」都是「情話」;婚後,「情話」都是「廢話」。

婚前,「靠近」一點;婚後,「閃開」一點。

婚前,「沒話找話說」;婚後,「有話也不說」。

「成功」?對男人的定義是指能「賺」很多的錢,對女人的定義是指能「花」很多的錢。

男人有錢就變壞,女人變壞就有錢。

男人沒有女人,「耳根清淨」;女人沒有男人,「居乾淨」。

男人「入錯行」,上班會很痛苦;女人「嫁錯郎」,下班會很痛苦。

好女人,養壞男人的胃口;壞女人,吊足男人的胃口。

婚前,男人像「傳令兵」;婚後,男人像「指官」。

失戀不見得是世界末日:你的心也許會「泣血」,你的荷包卻可以不再「失血」。
0 Comments
Asking salary increase
Posted:May 6, 2008 2:37 am
Last Updated:Mar 30, 2011 6:33 am
14966 Views

One day an employee sends a letter to her boss
asking for an increase her salary.



Dear Bo$$

In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to your company.

I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re$pond $oon.

Your$ $incerely,
Norman $hah




The next day, the employee received this letter of reply:


Dear NOrman

I kNOw you have been working very hard. NOwadays, NOthing much has changed. You must have NOticed that our company is NOt doing NOticeably well as yet.

NOw the newspaper are saying the world`s leading ecoNOmists are NOt sure if the United States may go into aNOther recession. After the NOvember presidential elections things may turn bad.

I have NOthing more to add NOw.
You kNOw what I mean.
0 Comments
My love will get you home
Posted:Dec 30, 2007 7:46 pm
Last Updated:Jul 7, 2010 6:52 am
16133 Views
My love will get you home
sing by£ºchristine glass


If you wander off too far
My love will get you home
If you follow the wrong star
My love will get you home
If you ever find yourself
Lost and all alone
Get back on your feet and think of me
My love will get you home Boy
My love will get you home

If the bright lights blinds your eyes
My love will get you home
If your troubles break your stride
My love will get you home
If you ever find yourself
Lost and all alone
Get back on your feet and think of me
My love will get you home Boy
My love will get you home

If you ever feel ashame
My love will get you home
If its only you to blame
My love will get you home
If you ever find yourself
Lost and all alone
Get back on your feet and think of me
My love will get you home Boy
My love will get you home

If you ever find yourself
Lost and all alone
Get back on your feet and think of me
My love will get you home Boy
My love will get you home Boy
My love will get you home

To all of you Happy new year

0 Comments
Never A Christmas Morning
Posted:Dec 18, 2007 2:02 am
Last Updated:Sep 23, 2009 1:21 am
16301 Views
Never A Christmas Morning
Never The Old Year Ends
But Somebody Thinks of Somebody
Old Days
Old Times
Old Friends

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND
A FABULOUS NEW YEAR
IN 2008

0 Comments
The best way we can~~~~
Posted:Oct 9, 2007 11:24 pm
Last Updated:Sep 23, 2009 1:21 am
15690 Views

LIFE never seems to be the way we want it,
but we LIVE it the best way we can.


There is no PERFECT life,
but we fill it with PERFECT MOMENTS.....


Have a great day to you.
0 Comments
LOVE....!!!!???
Posted:Oct 7, 2007 1:36 am
Last Updated:Nov 4, 2008 12:04 am
15130 Views

I love you not because of who you are,but because of who I am when I am with you.

No man or woman is worth your tears,and the one who is ,won't make you cry.

The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.

Never frown,even when you are sad,because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.

To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.

Don't waste your time on a man/woman,who isn't willing to waste their time on you.

Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to,doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

Don't try to hard,the best things come when you least expect them to.Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one,so that when we finally meet the person,we will know how to be grateful.

Don't cry because it is over,smile because it happened.

Life is a pure flame,and we live by an invisible sun within us.
——Sir Thomas Browne



译文:

我爱你,不是因为你是一个怎样的人,而是因为我喜欢与你在一起时的感觉。

没有人值得你流泪,值得让你这么做的人不会让你哭泣。

失去某人,最糟糕的莫过于,他近在身旁,却犹如远在天边。

纵然伤心,也不要悉眉不展,因为你不知是谁会爱上你的笑容。

对于世界而言,你是一个人;但是对于某人,你是他的整个世界。

不要为那些不愿在你身上花费时间的人而浪费你的时间。

爱你的人如果没有按你所希望的方式爱你,那并不代表他们没有全心全意地爱你。

不要着急,最好的总会在最不经意的时候出现。在遇到梦中人之前,上天也许会安排我们先遇到别人;在我们终于遇见心仪的人时,便应当心存感激。

不要因为结束而哭泣,微笑吧,为你的曾经拥有。

“生命是束纯净的火焰,我们依靠自己内心看不见的太阳而存在。”

--------托马斯 布朗爵士

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